Follow My New Adventures....

My life has taken a turn to be seriously counted in to what God has for me. I am only moving when He says move and only going where He calls me. I want to purposefully live surrendered to God and His plans for me.

I've loved sharing what God is doing in me and through me here but what I am doing now is flowing straight out of being 100% counted into the purposes of God and where God is taking me as I choose Him. 

So for now my life happening's and God's happenings in my life will be shared here!  

You can also follow this link...

http://hannahcarrigan.wordpress.com

Parenting From A Child's Perspective

Last night we were sitting at the table playing a game when my sister, Ashtyn, told us about a conversation she had with a couple for whom she babysits. They always ask about ways she was raised, how my parents handled certain situations, and other questions pertaining to parenting, raising children, etc. One of their questions went something like this...

What did your parents instill in you that caused you to have a personal relationship with God?

Good question, right?

Is that something you have ever thought about? Maybe. I had never given it much thought. "That's how we were raised," would be my cop out answer. But what does that mean?

Her questions inspired me to think about how I was raised, how I got to where I am now, and actually see what it is that my parents did that encouraged us, challenged us, and shaped us into the people we are now. 

It isn't as easy as "1, 2, 3" or "A, B, C" but they have done and continue to do their best. They share their wisdom and don't pretend to have all of the answers. They point us to God because they know we have to learn to hear His voice on our own. I think that is key. They recognize that as our parents they are here to care for us, love us, and ultimately train us in the way we should go (Proverbs 22:6). They want to prepare us for whatever God might have for us, for wherever He might take us. If we were their robots we wouldn't be prepared for the "real world"... Or, what is more important, we wouldn't have learned to listen and be obedient to God's voice. 

I remember times when one of us kids would disagree with the way they thought about something or what they believed would be best. Sometimes they would ask us to trust them and we would have to. (I think that was key in learning to trust God even when things didn't make sense to us. Trust in God has been crucial especially in the last year of my life and I definitely attribute how easy it has come to the way I was raised). Not all times did they respond that way. Sometimes they would tell us to seek God about it. They said they would do the same. Either our heart would change about the matter, or theirs would. Through that we learned to seek Him, and find Him, and ultimately listen to Him. 

When our parents encouraged us to go to God, they were encouraging a personal relationship with Him. It wasn't all about us doing what they said all the time. 

They also led by example. Like I said, when they asked us to seek God about something, they would do the same. That was a part of their life. When they needed direction, they searched for Him. When they didn't know what to do, they asked Him. They are obedient to God and it has paid off. 

My parents are very different but they compliment each other. They bring different insight and are exactly who and what we needed as we grew (and continue to grow) into who God wants us to be.

My relationship with God is real and personal. I love Him more than anything in this world. I desire nothing more than to be loved by Him, love Him more, and fulfill the purpose that He has for my life. That desire is because of the relationship I have with God but without the seed my parents planted and cultivated I would not be where I am now.

I'm sure if you were to talk to them they would tell you they didn't do everything right and that you probably won't either; not to make you feel inadequate but for when you do mess up that you know it's okay. 

They're not perfect. I'm not perfect. Neither are you. Or your children. By the mercy of God, though, we have access to unending grace and forgiveness that allows us to try again... all the time. If I could encourage you in any way, I would say to look at the example of Jesus and live like Him. When you mess up, because you will, apologize, ask for more grace, and keep going. This could only lead to you truly looking and living more like Jesus. 

A Simple Truth

God is good all the time.

Why?

Because God's goodness does not depend on us or our circumstances. It does not depend on our ability to be good or do good.

He just is good.

A New Excitement

As always I went to camp this year with undefined expectations. I had full faith that God would work in my life and others lives. I didn't doubt that we would come away changed. We always do.

I did not know what that would like though. I did not know the full magnitude of all that meant. I do now. Not surprisingly God went above all that I could have imagined or hoped for.

The first day a few of my friends (Bethany, Jordan, Ashtyn, Grace, Macey and Nini) and I were sharing what was on our hearts and places where we wanted God to impact us. After hearing their hearts I was excited then to talk to them at the end of camp and see how God had touched them in those places.

But I didn't have to wait until the end of camp. After the first night of camp God had already worked. He filled places in my heart where I needed Him and brought an overwhelming peace. When we were all sharing that first day my prayer was for my future. I shared that I was looking forward to college but did not really have the excitement I wanted. I also didn't really have peace about what came after college at Ouachita. I was anxious (more than I thought) about where I would go to medical school, how long it was going to take me, and what life looked like after that. I didn't want to worry but I wondered.

So the first night Chris White shared a message about being counted in to the purposes of God for our life that helped me to surrender my future and my worries and encouraged me to trust God with my future. I definitely wanted to be one hundred percent counted into God's purposes in my life. The words that caused the surrender was when he said "You may not see the whole step but you have to have the faith for what part you see." Wait. I don't have to know what is after this step? I don't have to know the whole step to take it? Whew. At that point I didn't just know but I understood that I could surrender all of my future and that I didn't have to figure it out but I could just trust God for the now. That truth sunk deep into my heart and I let go of control.

Of course, God wasn't done. The next day my foot started hurting terribly. I didn't doubt that God was more than able to heal it. Immediately I prayed over my foot trusting for the pain to leave. It didn't. Okay, God, what are you doing? I asked Bethany to pray for it. She did multiple times. It would get better then get worse than it was before. I determined that would not keep me from worshipping fully and the enemy would not rob my joy. Tuesday night during worship I felt God say it was okay to just sit and rest my foot... I could still worship Him that way. So I went to the back of the room and just sat. I prayed and I worshipped. At some point I had a friend, John, come sit down and begin to pray for me. (Take note that I had not shared anything with him going on in my heart that week). He prayed for my future - he prayed against fear and for peace. At first I didn't fully know why he prayed that. I never felt like I feared the future. I just received the prayers though and kept worshipping. In breakout that night I asked everyone to pray for my foot. They did willingly. It was getting a little better but the pain was still there. Hunter took me out of the room just to remove me from any doubt that might be surrounding me. He spoke healing into my foot and all of the pain was gone. We thanked and praised God and all went back to our rooms. I walked into Ashtyn and Macey's room and immediately my foot gave out. What?? I determined to not let that discourage me. God had healed me and this pain was not from Him. Ashtyn was ready to pray for me again but Macey felt God speaking to her. She felt like this pain was more than just a physical problem but something going on spiritually. She asked if I had a fear of something. I thought about it and replied no because I couldn't think of anything. She then asked if I had a fear of moving away. I immediately broke down. I was crying for reasons I didn't know. There was a fear in my heart that I didn't realize was there. After Macey had the impression that it had something to do with fear she said that she was thinking about feet and what they did. Her thought was "well, they take us places" and that is why she asked about the fear of moving way because that is where I was "being taken" next. Ashtyn then shared the revelation that in Ephesians 6 when we put on the armor of God we are to put on the "shoes of peace." To me the opposite of feeling fear is to have peace. Wow, everything was connecting. Being the amazing friends they are they prayed for me and I let go. My foot, not coincidentally, started getting better too. The pain in my foot was connected to the fear I was holding onto and the lack of peace I was walking in.

Wow. That's all I could say. God was cleansing my heart and freeing me from so much and I loved it. That night I was thinking about all that God had done in my heart and remembered John praying against fear and for peace. That could only be God. He knew what was in my heart even when I didn't. Before I went to bed my foot was still hurting. Not terribly but the pain was evident. But it didn't bother me. I felt like the gradual healing in my foot related to the work God was completing in my heart. I felt Him say that when He had completed the work in my heart my foot would be healed. I could trust that.

So all of that happened on just Monday and Tuesday. Now Wednesday. That was a freeing day. What was spoken to me connected to everything else though was so perfect (of course). Hunter was praying for my foot again Wednesday morning. He felt that there was a spiritual battle going on for the healing in my body. As we all prayed the angels were fighting the demons (remember, "For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places." Ephesians 6:12). Everything made more and more sense as God continued to speak and we continued to pray. A few people had gathered around me and a girl I didn't know came up to pray for me (God had healed her foot that week). God gave her a picture of my foot and how His hands were molding my foot and just putting pieces back together that were out of place. God had given me that picture for the work He was doing in my heart that week. Perfect, again!

Thursday. Oh, Thursday. Could the week get any better? I guess so! During the morning service Timmy came up to me and shared a picture God gave him for me. Yes! I love words from God. The picture was of stepping stones. The further away the stones got the further a part from each other they got. The stones represented the next steps in my life and the growing space between each one represented the increase in faith God was giving me through each step. Oh my goodness. I was so overwhelmed. God knows exactly what I need to hear and He is SO faithful to share it. God already knows those next steps and He is going to give me the faith I need for each one! Timmy also felt like God was saying to me that "This is just the beginning of my life." No one could have known what that meant to me. In the worry of my future I was so concerned how long it would take me to get through college, medical school, internships, etc. I couldn't help but think how old I would be by the time all of that was done. It just seemed so far away and that my life would be so far along by then. It was such a big deal. But God says my life is just beginning!

God was continuing to bring me freedom. I was letting go of everything. The last morning session (Thursday morning) just sealed everything. Chris White spoke about "unleashing our destiny in the world" and I knew that for me that meant having the faith to take the step that I could see like he had spoke about on Monday night. I wanted to to be counted in completely and throughout the week God had freed me of everything to lead me to the place where that was possible.

The last session (Thursday night) was me walking and worshipping in that freedom. The Holy Spirit fell and filled the whole place. There was no need for everyone to go back to their seats and listen to a sermon. Worship continued as Travis Gay shared what God had placed on his heart. I was completely surrendered and had released myself to Him. That was the most beautiful release. I was overcome by the Holy Spirit that He controlled even my physical movements. I had the Holy Spirit jerks and an uncontrollable laughter. And guess what? All of the pain in my foot was completely gone. I was so full of the joy of the Lord.

I have never felt so free. I can't explain the excitement God has filled me with for my future and even for the unknown. This next season is going to be amazing. Walking in His freedom and His spirit is the most beautiful way of life. I will continue to choose His freedom and His gift of the Holy Spirit forever.

Take Me Deeper

This has been a long awaited post but I am finally getting around to playing catch up on sharing different things God has been showing me and what is going on in my life.

These past few months have been so full and extremely busy. The fall semester I spent quite a bit of time acclimating to my senior schedule and working out college details. Academically it has been a challenge which can be stressful at times. My time management skills have faltered a little. It is so abnormal and I am looking forward to overcoming that in the spring semester. I tried to blame it on senioritis but I don't need an excuse because that just causes my motivation to decrease even more.

Academics are important to me. God calls us to work at everything we do with all of our heart as if we were working for Him and not for men (Colossians 3:23). That inspires and encourages me. This semester (in my school struggles) all of it became so tedious and mundane. I became restless in my day to day living. Frustration slowly crept in as I sought the Lord in all areas of life but specifically in my academics. I desired to spend time in His presence but the overwhelming amount of school was a battle. I lived freely and fully and enjoyed life. I really did make wonderful memories but there was this unspoken frustration when it came to school and just important tasks I needed to get done.

I lacked motivation academically. The lack there came from the lack of excitement in a way spiritually. Yes, God is constantly teaching me and opening my eyes to a different perspective but I felt dry and needed refreshment. That is exactly how I felt academically.

At this time I became weaker. My strength drained even more. But His strength became more evident. In my weakness, His strength was greater. God was breaking me so that He could be my source of strength. He was taking me deeper.

These past few months that has been a constant process. My weakness has become more obvious but only so His strength could become mine (2 Corinthians 12:9-10) so that I could grow into a deeper level with Him. This past semester God used academics to reveal that. Even in school I cannot do it in my own strength. When I try to do even those little things on my own I become frustrated and drained. God created us to need Him and and I am learning that. If I am purposeful about my time with the Lord His strength will be mine in my weakness.

"But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you." -Matthew 6:33

Jesus is talking to the multitudes and previous to this verse he explains that if God takes care of the birds of the air how much more will He care for us? He encourages them to not worry about the daily things in life but be faithful in seeking the Lord first and everything else we need He will take care of.

That has been my motivation and what will carry me this semester. I am learning every day how refreshing the presence of God is and the strength I gain from Him. I look forward to this last semester of high school to live out all that God has taught me and is continuing to teach me. I will definitely need that as I continue into college and medical school especially. I love how He prepares us for all that He has for us. I see the preparation and am so thankful for God's personal relationship with us.

Worry

Worry. It is so easy to do. That natural tendency of an earthly minded person is to worry about everything. What am I going to do about this? How am I going to get all of this done? What is going to happen if...? We are trying to figure it all out. By worrying we take the authority out of God's hands and place control in ours. His Word says "to be anxious in nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." We have to be willing to let go of control and place everything in God's hands. All of your worries will then be replaced with peace.

When we change to a Kingdom mindset our perspective starts to change and our lives are transformed.

But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

Matthew 6:33-34

Jesus told us to seek first the Kingdom. Focus on God. Seek His righteousness. Then all these things will be added to you. What are all these things? In the previous verses Jesus talks about our food and our clothing and says "do not worry about your life." Our life. God will give us everything we need for life. Keep your focus on Him.

It does us no good to worry.

Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?

Luke 12:25

Our lives don't improve. Our circumstances don't get better. Worry doesn't help anything. It will take a change in perspective but when we learn to focus on God and not our circumstances life will be so much richer.

Stop Trying So Hard

That's what God was trying to tell me.

"Stop trying so hard and just be."

I found myself overwhelmed, frustrated, and confused after a few weeks of trying to figure out what God wanted me to do...what He wanted my life to look like... and what people I was supposed to be in relationship with.

Yet I don't ever remember reading in God's word a step by step plan for our life...what exactly we were supposed to do. I'm pretty sure He gave us free choice for a reason. He is not looking for robots, just relationships.

Galatians 5:13-14

"For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. ¹⁴ For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”

He made us free. And He made us to love Him and to love others.

He didn't make us free so that we would live selfish, sinful lives. He made us free because He loved (loves) us just that much.

He lays out choices before us and says, "choose one, I'll bless it." Don't be afraid to make a choice because you're afraid of making a mistake. It's better to trust God, take a step of faith, and make a mistake because God's grace is sufficient and if you are letting God take control, He is responsible for the outcome (and I promise it will be a good one). But! If you are trying to make things work out in your strength, you are responsible for the outcome... and it will be messy.

So just try. Step out in faith and live for Him. Seek God with all of your heart and dive in. Don't stress over unnecessary things. It's not worth it. I've experienced it. But God broke past my box of thinking and once again amazed me with His revelation, love, and perfect timing. He has taught be how to just "be." I am learning how to be who He has created me to be... who He has called me to be... without being in control and without stressing/being nervous/anxious about every little step I am supposed to take.

Proverbs 16:9

A man’s heart plans his way,
But the LORD directs his steps.

You've already died, so you are FREE.

‎"Bullets don't scare you. Mediocrity scares you.
Losing your life doesn't scare you. Wasting it does."
-Dutch Sheets

I dont know how to make the video fit, so here is the link

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXo0cEWw8zg.

It is so worth the two minutes.

Spring Break: Day 8

The Zoo!

I have not been to the zoo in a long time! Sunday before school started back I went with Trent, John, and his sister's family to the zoo then on a mini train ride. It was a great way to end a fun week!

The animals are not only fun to look at but show God's amazing creativity and design. Every creature was uniquely created.

Matthew 6:26

Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds.

Such a good reminder!

Spring Break: Days Three and Four

The last couple of days Ash, Ethan and I spent at the Tates. Now that they are in public school and we all have extremely busy lives we do not get to hang out as often. This week we took advantage of the break from school and spent a couple of days out there. One of our other friends, John, is here for a couple weeks staying with them so we were all able to spend some time together. It had been too long!

We always have something to do there wether it be jumping on the trampoline, playing games, dew pong, or practicing dancing (for prom). It's always nice to stay with the Tates for a couple of days...they're my family that I do not see often enough.

We stayed up until 5 am on Tuesday night/Wednesday morning just talking. We were dissecting different parts of the Bible and sharing what we got out of it. There was a long discussion about the end times...which always proves to be a thought provoking topic. I am so blessed to have friends that have a spiritual depth that challenges me. I am always up for a good conversation about God.

That is pretty much what has filled the past couple of days...I took a few pictures while we were there but I left my camera. :( Any pictures from this week will probably be up on Facebook eventually!

I hope you're having a splendid week!

Oh the theatre, the theatre!

Wizard of Oz has come to an end. I have learned and grown so much through this production and it has been incredible to watch God work through each and every one of us.

After a week of ice/snow that canceled all of our rehearsals and caused us to postpone performances for a week, we were all a little out of our roles. God used that time though as a refreshing and restful week. A few of the cast members were sick and He healed them.

One afternoon before a performance one thing after another went wrong. 1) Miranda (who played Dorothy) was sick. 2) The dog playing Toto was hurt and we were told he was not coming 3) One of our makeup artists hurt her back and could not come 4) Everyone was fighting for energy and excitement for the show.

There were about 10 of us who are in the show sitting in the coffee shop, so Lexi pulled us together and asked if we would all just pray. We asked for healing, peace, and that He would work everything out for this show. It was an incredible and unifying time for all of us.

Mark 11:24

"Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."

We believed that God would answer our prayers and guess what? He did. Within the next hour we got a call from the family who is letting us use the dog and were told he was able to come, a friend of ours was able to come help out with makeup in replacement of our other makeup artist, I got a text from Portia (who had no clue what was going on) with all these verses that related to everything we had prayed about, and Miranda told us that she was feeling so much better! God answers prayers.

That is not the only day of miracles for us during this performance. After the last performance, we always feast at CAIA. Well the eating and festivities were coming to an end and the some of the kids (all my friends in the show-everyone) had gathered outside in the field. I walked out of the annex and there they were worshipping and crying out to God. I quickly joined the worship circle and was overwhelmed with God's love. He worked in every single person's heart during this show and I was blessed to be a part of it.

I love what God can do even in theatre and that is one of the reasons I do it.